They live among us!

“Are you in line?” a woman asks.

The answer should be obvious, what with my shopping cart strategically placed behind another cart, which is one behind the cart currently at the register. But I smile and say yes.

“Ok then,” she says. “I’m going to stand behind you.”

Sounds good, until I realize that she means right behind me, like close enough to pose for a photo without the aid of a selfie stick. Close enough to Tango. Basically, danger close.

“You like Greek yogurt,” she says.

“I do.”

“And hummus.”

I shrug. She continues to inventory my cart.


The line moves, she stays on my hip. No zone coverage in this line.


“Bell peppers.”

“Cranberry sauce.”

“Thanksgiving,” I say.

I move to the credit card reader. Her man coverage remains tight. Effective.

I insert the card and wait.

“You have a chip,” the woman says. “Someday we’ll all have chips in our brains.”

“I think some of us already do,” I say.

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