Removes head from ass

“Man, I thought this was going to be an easy one, but it’s turned into a real what-do-you-call-it? Like… just a total mess. And these guys, these fucking guys… They can do better, and they know I know that they can do better. And this is just not acceptable. It’s not. And frankly, and to be real with you about this, Michael, I’ve just totally had my head up my ass on this one. So I apologize.”

The “mess” is the basketball-sized hole in our ceiling. Or more specifically, it’s the dodgy patchwork.

The people who “can do better” are the painters, who will be on day four of a two-day job, as of tomorrow morning.

The man apologizing out of his ass is my building manager, who thanks me for my understanding.

“For real, Michael. And may the Force be with you.”

That last part worries me. Will I need the power of some ancient religion to fix my ceiling?

“The tree, man. It’s awesome. With R2. And Luke. And Han. Amazing! A couple weeks. You ready? You know they’re coming out with a new movie?”

I nod. But he assumes that my head has been up my ass, so he proceeds to give me the download on what the Internet knows about Episode VII.

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